Previously Known As Chopperpapa.com

Co-parenting has nothing to do with kids and everything to do with parents. Kids can adapt  - and given proper support, love, and patience -  can, and will, thrive in the aftermath of a divorce. In those unfortunate but all too common instances where they don’t thrive, but instead suffer, doubt, and fear, it is not because of any fallout from divorce.   Most often, children struggle in the aftermath of a parents’ divorce because their parents fail, and specifically fail to do what is right over what is easy. It begins with putting aside differences, hurts, and jealousies. I once knew of an ex-wife so upset by her former husband’s new relationship, that she childishly keyed the woman’s car.  I’ve known of fathers who will not pay child support, or intentionally pay late, in hopes of soothing their bitterness. I’ve heard first-hand stories of the diabolical lengths moms and dads go, out of pure revenge, to turn a child against the other parent.   If co-p...

Language is important. What we say about a thing says as much about us as it does the thing. Take relationships and particularly cheating. Those with little tolerance describe it with that Old Testament word, ‘adultery.’ Others with less conviction may use, ‘affair.’ The watered-down terms ‘infidelity’ or ‘extramarital relationship’ have become popular for the more progressive.  This same phenomenon can be said for countless areas of life. How we refer to families is no exception.  There are many labels for the family created when one or both spouses bring children into a new marriage. ‘Stepfamily’ remains most common. ‘Blended family’ gets regular airplay. There is also ‘jigsaw family’, ‘non-nuclear family’, and ‘bonus family.’ Yet for those living it every day, these names may not seem appropriate. ‘Stepfamily’ makes it seem a step down-from something better. ‘Jigsaw’ is too closely associated with a horror movie. ‘Bonus’ seems overly Pinterest. ‘Non-Nuclear’ is candidly wei...